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Why I Hate Valentine's Day
Normally I love Hallmark Holidays. Mother's and Father's Day I love because I get to spoil my folks for a change. But the big V.D. I hate. This is a holiday expressly designed to cause pain and loneliness.
If you're single you are made to feel ignored and alone and somehow broken or unlovable because you don't have a valentine. If you're in a relationship you're made to feel like your entire future happiness rides on whether they get you/you get them the right gift.
Either way, you're screwed. This is a day of unreasonable expectations and false expressions of love. Sure he beats on you 364 days a year, but if he gets you a box of chocolates this one day everything's ok. Or, she screws around with all of your friends, but if you just send the right kind of flowers she'll stop straying and stay with you forever.
Then there's the whole flower/chocolate problems. One in 3 American adults (yes, I'm the one of three) is overweight. Yet our culture and our health desires thinness, or at least not obesity. So, on a day when we are theoretically supposed to be expressing our love for someone we are giving them a threat to their health, social standing and self-esteem. "Here honey, shovel this down your throat" right?
And from an ecological standpoint, are we really helping Mother Earth by sending flowers that will be dead in a few days anyway? Why not plant a tree in honor of your love instead? As it grows so will your love. Much more meaningful symbolism to my mind.
Lest anyone think I am writing this out of sour grapes or a lack of love in my life, I am very well loved. I have friends who are dear to me, parents whom I adore, sweet, fuzzy cats and most of all a man who loves me, treats me like a queen and whom I love passionately.
So next year, skip the little candy hearts and boxes of chocolates. Boycott artificial niceness and a seeming of affection for the real thing. Go help your neighbor shovel their walk (if it's snowy) or volunteer at a homeless shelter. Give your spouse/partner/self a night off from chores. Play a game with your kids or take them to the library. And do this throughout the year. Not just one day of it.